A Poet - and I Didn't Know It...

As I embark on the journey of the Breast Cancer 3-Day Walk to cure this disease - I was inspired by Clement Clarke Moore's timeless poem, "A Visit From St. Nicholas".  My poem is certainly of a more abbreviated nature.

A Inspired Visit from St. Peregrine (patron saint of cancer patients and healing)
Twas the Night Before the 3-Day...when all through the house...all the pink clothing was stirring, and there was concerns of a douse



The weather was forecast to be rainy and damp, but the weather won't stop the event and, thank goodness, no camp...(for me anyway :))

The preparations were done on the asphalt with care, in hopes of that the cure soon would be there...

The shoes were all laced and the sox clean and bright,
there was much excitement for the pasta dinner tonight


When out on the lawn there arose such a clatter, she sprang from her bed to see what was the matter
When what to her wondering eyes should appear, but a fanny pack with water bottles, and all the right gear


And she whistled and shouted and called the checklist by name:
Now poncho, now Body Glide, now shorts and aspirin,
On bandaids, on T-shirt, on mole skin, on Neospirin,


She spoke not a word, but went straight to the work, and she walked for the cause so that fewer would hurt

And I heard her exclaim as she walked out of sight
"Happy 3 Day to All - and please St. Peregrine, no more breast cancer in sight"


Carpe Diem, and so it is...

Attention, Please...

It amazes me what happens when you "pay attention".  In this modern and hectic life, so much occurs and fills the space that is normally consumed just by being consumed.  Busy to be busy, distracted to just be that way. 


And then, there is a moment of quiet, when mobile devices and televisions and ipods and all manner of thing falls away, and you can SEE what needs to be seen (and wonderful surprises as well), and attend to that which needs or desires attending, and be at peace knowing you make a difference just by paying attention. 


It was in one of those moments of attention that I found this quote - and boy, did it help me see...


"Once, there was no road where I wanted to go.  So I made my own.


And I haven't looked back ever since.


My dream is to carve my own path.  I was never one to follow maps. "

Carpe Diem, and so it is...

Migraine Musings and Metaphors

I deal with migraines on a pretty consistent basis - and today is one of those days.  I felt it starting last night (it literally feels like a big brick with spikes is is crawling up the back of my neck).  Despite efforts to the contrary - it arrived this early morning.  Of course the hot dog I ate last night loaded with those tasty nitrates didn't help, but I was at a ball game.  Ball game = hot dog.  It is a universal law that those two things go together.  Amen.

Why am I writing then?  It is too painful at present to do nothing and rest.  It's easier for me to keep my mind engaged till the Imitrex kicks in (if it does).  In this stage of the migraine event - I do things to avoid the pain - drink coffee, thumb through magazines, wander around adjusting pictures, writing in the blog...  Unfortunately, avoiding the pain now doesn't necessarily prevent it from having to be "gone through" later.  Sometimes, going through it teaches you how to deal with it the next time and the next time...



During the migraine event itself - depending on it's "personality" - it is a real challenge to exist.   My migraines have different personalities.   Some cause sensitivity to smell, some light, some touch, some noise, some cause extreme nausea, some knock me out so hard I don't even remember getting through them.  They last between 12 hours and 72 hours - again depending on the  "personality".   During that time, unless I can intercept with Imitrex, I need to go through it and come out the other side feeling better.  Going through usually involves a lot of sleeping, ice packs, sometimes a bit of writhing, and just plain praying for the pain to be done. 



Just before an event concludes - the pain is the ABSOLUTE worst.  I have named it the "spike" and it can be wretched.  I can't sleep, eat or move around.  It is basically sitting as best as possible and waiting for the end of it.  Nothing can soothe this phase - it just needs to pass. 


But then - (cue the white heavenly light) - it starts to stop and "lift"...as if almost by magic.

When the migraine is over - the pressure empties, the brick and spikes disappear, and my head feels a rush of (what I perceive to be) cold air filling the vacuum of the spots that hurt so badly.  It is peaceful and refreshing.  The pain evaporates into the ether and there is this exhausted but wonderful "high" that fills in the gap where the pain was.  This transition wipes out any remaining energy I have, but it is such an awesome conclusion to such a nasty time.  There is such serenity in knowing that the pain is gone, and I can return back to my "normal" self (hahaha).   The sleep following a migraine is like being wrapped up in a big thick down comforter with big fluffy down pillows, like 5 of them...

As with migraines and other things, sometimes, the only way through the pain is to go through the pain.  As Winston Churchill once said, "when you are going through hell, keep going."  Feel what you are feeling, don't avoid it, but face it, learn from it, and know that it will soon be done.  And then, on to the plush down comforter (and perhaps some really good macaroni and cheese - yummy). 


The pill isn't kicking in yet, and it appears I am into an event.  Time to gird the loins and get going through it so it can be done before Friday.  That topic for another entry.


To all who are getting and going through pain - I wish you the best.  Carpe Diem, migraine and all...and so it is...