To Begin, Again...

I read this passage earlier today, and completely agree...


"Congratulations! You are back! You are finally allowing yourself to be who you are meant to be instead of living your life according to everyone else’s expectations. When you honor your true self, life is so much more rewarding and less stressful because you are living in authenticity."


Carpe Diem, and so it is...

On Any Given Day...

the most amazing coincidences can happen - and when they do - it's astounding the directions in which one is led...

Carpe Diem, and so it is...

Thursday, October 14th, 2010 - Carpe Diem, Putting the Past Away, And Another "11"

Today has been extraordinary and transformative in the most simple yet profound ways. 

• 11 - the positive power number has appeared again and again. 
• Coincidences en masse
• Signs - popping up everywhere

Since I am doing a half marathon this weekend, and since I haven't been my most healthy self, I have been "indulging" a bit too much in treats.  I declared that I could eat whatever I wanted this week - and has that ever been a true statement.  Treats are not bad, as Grandpa Phil always said, everything in moderation.  Well - I forgot the "moderation" part and just went for the everything.  The wagon isn't too far gone, but unless stopped, it would ride into a many pound weight gain, and that just is not acceptable.

While watching that last miner ascend yesterday (miraculous!), I enjoyed a high calorie and  fat treat.  I was rejoicing with the world at this miracle, and rejoice equals coconut cream pie, right?  It capped off an unhealthy dinner, a ridiculously bad lunch, and an earlier indulgence that I don't wish to acknowledge (yes I know - my head is in the sand). 

This morning, I woke up with a migraine and a cold in my chest - no surprise there.  My jeans were in a word "snug".  And quite frankly, I felt like I had been to the junk food bender-orama.  This capped the build up to detonation, and when I got on the scale this morning to face the truth - BOOM!!!

The word "Detoxify" came to me, and the meaning resonated.  To feel better, I ate worse.  What an old and stale pattern that is / was.  Eating junk wasn't going to help "fix" anything.  Using white cheddar popcorn as a weapon - not going to dent the enemy. Injesting chemically created "cream" on a pie?  Really? 

The root of the eating?  For another blog, but we all have "something"...

Oy...

So - Done...Enough...

To quote from The Labours of Hercules by Dr. Francis Merchant, the Teacher said to Hercules:
"One word of counsel only I may give...
We rise by kneeling; we conquer by surrendering; we gain by giving up"

When we face a hydra with nine heads (one of which may be a Dorito, or a bag of them), fighting a conventional battle of  brute force will only empower it.  If you cut off one head, two more will instantly appear (these then shaped like a Dairy Queen Cone and  A Hostess Ho Ho). 

A Different (and smarter) Strategy:
If you get down, grab that hydra and raise it up, suspended in mid-air, it's powers diminsh.  The light and air causes that nasty ol' beast to be weak, and then, we can take it out with ease and never see its ugly heads again.

Today is declared to be Hydra Be Gone Day...

On another note - and profound in a different way:

Between Monday, December 3rd, 2007 and Wednesday, April 14th, 2010 - there were:

• 2 years, 4 months, and 11 days
• 863 Days
• 20,712 hours
• 1,242,720 minutes
• 74,563,200 second

This is the Past.  It is now done, concluded, over, finito, finished, basta.  Thank you for the lessons, and for giving me such knowledge, wisdom and experience.

Between Wednesday, April 14th, 2010 and Thursday, October 14th, 2010 - there were:

• 6 months
• 183 Days
• 4,392 hours
• 263,520 minutes
• 15,811,200 seconds

This is now also the Past. It is concluded and complete.

Between Thursday, October 14th, 2010 and Wednesday, September 14th, 2011 - there are:

• 335 Days
• 8,040 Hours
• 482,400 Minutes
• 28,944,000 Seconds
• It is equal to exactly 11 months (there is that number again...)

This is the beginning of a great present and a incredible future.

Carpe Diem - and so it is.

Carpe Diem Reminder #216

I just got word that a dear former colleague of mine passed away from a heart attack at age 52.  That's tough to take, but for me it is another reminder to live in the present moment, and don't let the minisule irritations get in the way. 

Treasure the simple:

• Playing a fierce game of Trouble with my nieces, and then snuggling with them under a pile of blankets on a chilly fall evening wearing our matching pajamas
• A gorgeous maple tree changing colors
• Sunshine
• A feast of Chinese takeout
• A fantastic conversation with someone in a customer service job that actually wants to provide customer service above and beyond (thank you BethAnn at the Mandarin Oriental!  You are the best!)
• A note from my college freshman godson telling me "I'm the best" for no apparent reason
• Finding the perfect birthday card for my mother that I know will make her cry in a good way

These are not monumental moments, but they are the moments that thread together our lives, and sometimes, that is all the special that is required. 

Joe -many will miss you.  Thank you for being a part of my life for the time you were, and thank you for the viseral and painful reminder that Carpe Diem / All In is the only way to live. 

"Showing Up" - Part Two

For the last three days - I have been "showing up" to continue preparations for the upcoming distance events.  This is generally unremarkable other than since I have been contending with a flare up, this is the first time in several weeks that there has been training this many days in a row. 

Sunday - 4 miles outside in the crisp fall air.  It was literally sparkling and the trees was vibrant in their colorful garb. 

Monday - tennis for the first time in forever.  It felt so great to play, to hit, and to feel the ball contact the strings and go zooming back over the net.  Serena and Venus - I'm back...

Tuesday - 5.37 miles on the treadmill, abs and lower body weights.   I let go control of my Ipod and shuffled - (rare for me).  It played a lot of Monkees and Springsteen - an unlikely combination, but it worked.  Throw in some Rolling Stones and it made for a great workout. 

Truthfully, there will be aspirin and an Icy Hot patch tonight to quell the aches mainly induced by the tennis playing (different muscle groups).  But I showed up - 3 days in a row.  As previously mentioned, to hit the ball, you gotta go to the ballpark.

Now - will I "show up" tomorrow?  Will my joints cooperate?  More to follow...

Carpe Diem, and so it is...

"Showing Up" - Part One

You can't hit the ball unless you get up to bat...And you can't get up to bat unless you are at the ballpark.  You may hit a foul, a fly ball, or strike out all together, but you got up and went for it. 

Carpe Diem, and so it is...

Timing a Countdown - 40 Days

Is a countdown a good and motivational thing, or a bad and stress inducing thing? 

On New Years Eve - it is considered joyful and good.  "5, 4, 3, 2, 1 - Happy New Year!"  For a shuttle launch - it is exciting and inspiring.  I remember quite clearly standing on the NASA causeway six miles from the launch of Discovery on July 4th, 2006 and hearing the countdown - "T-minus 12, 11, 10, 9, 8, 7, 6 - go for main engine start, 2, 1 - booster ignition and liftoff of the Space Shuttle Discovery".  Incredible!

On the bad or stressful side - there is the common angst associated with a countdown to an event where one wants to lose weight, i.e. high school reunion, wedding.  What if the scale doesn't say the "right number"?  What if the dress doesn't fit?  What if the people I will see don't react well to me?  Not a good thing unless it serves as motivation to achieve a goal. 

This morning I found myself in the light grey area between inspiration and angst.  The countdown clock for me is at 40 days before The New York City Marathon.  

First - the angst:
I haven't received absolute, firm, signed, sealed and delivered confirmation of my participation in a charity.  So - I wonder if I will actually be participating, or watching on the sidelines while my two friends participate (which would be fine as well).  But - I don't sit well on the sidelines.  So my angst is the waiting (and waiting and waiting).  Hopefully this week - but until I know - I don't know and I like to know.  Angst inducer number two - I am also managing through an RA flareup that doesn't want to leave me as much as I want to see it go.  Each day I expect it to be gone, and each day it returns.  I hate that when that happens.  Fighting it makes it worse, so again, I wait for it to lift (and wait and wait).  
Angst - don't like you too much.

Second - the excitement:
I have 40 days remaining to complete preparations for the greatest marathon in the world (my opinion) and even if I somehow don't get my charity slot - I will be in marathon condition for another event in the same time frame (Honolulu again?  Vegas?)  The flare up will leave (darnit) - and I am working daily to escort it out the door of my joints and into the atmosphere. 

So today I chose the inspirational avenue towards this countdown.  I will obtain my charity slot (more on this organization and what they do - which is really amazing - once the final confirmation comes), and am going to get out and walk today.  I walked 4 miles yesterday despite my screaming joints, and I will go further today. 

Conclusion:
Countdown = positive and inspirational.  No more light grey - all systems are green and go for launch. 

Carpe Diem, and so it is.

Winning doesn't always mean First...

As my preparations continue for the New York City Marathon, I found this story that is so inspirational in its teaching of what is possible.  It is an amazing testiment to courage and to defining winning as not crossing first, but crossing in the face of significant physical obstacles.  Viva Zoe!  I can't wait to see her in a few weeks!

The Story:
Manhattanite Zoe Koplowitz is eager to take part in what will be her 22nd New York City Marathon on Nov. 7 -- and she'll be a winner, even though she'll probably finish last, as she always does.


Koplowitz, 62, lives with multiple sclerosis and diabetes and walks the route on magenta-tinted crutches and wearing eye shadow. Her finishing times have been between 29 hours and a possible record-setting 33 hours and 23 minutes, she said.

"I get the same satisfaction as someone who finishes it in three or four hours," said Koplowitz, a motivational speaker and author.

Koplowitz, who dismisses the pain she lives with -- "that's why God invented Advil" -- and is grateful to the Guardian Angels, who escort her during her overnight marathon hours, says she's on a mission to "reinvent the whole idea of winning."

"It's not always about being first," she said. "It's about doing everything you do from the center of your being with everything you've got. That's what makes a winner."

She has been nominated for a New York Post Liberty Medal in the Courage category by the New York City-Southern New York chapter of the National MS Society.

Read more: http://www.nypost.com/p/news/local/manhattan/marathon_first_lady_P0nNlZlB7fHujd45BFgRkI#ixzz10Auw8ztg

That Finish Line Feeling...

A finish line is a miraculous place. In a sporting event or a life event - months of preparations culminate in that brief and magic moment of "finishing".  But to finish - one must start, and then middle, and then finish.  That middle part - not always enjoyable, but a part of the process.  No shortcuts - just determination. 


Yesterday, I stood at the finish line of The Nation's Triathalon cheering for my sister as she completed her third triathalon this summer.  During the day, both on the course and at the finish - I observed many people of all shapes, sizes, and ages.  Some were barely moving and in pain and some were sprinting laughing, and literally kicking up their heels with joy.  No matter what state they were in - the crowd cheered them on, and the magic happened because they dared and prepared to finish what they started. 


That magic moment of finishing, of crossing that line of completion (whatever that may be) is incredible.  In an event such as a marathon or triathalon - it is the almost indescribable feeling of the medal placed around your neck.  That moment is worth every book and training manual studied, every early rising, every blister, every foregone martini, every hour of time spent away from a family - every sacrifice that was made.  You know in that instant that somehow, no matter what the circumstances, disabilities, distractions, and issues - a miracle was accomplished.  That miracle then spurs on more accomplishments, because you know that you can...

And so, you start again, and middle again, and finish again, and so on, and so on.


Not always easy - but the finish line represents the courage to begin, to try, to go out, and to succeed.


"Far better is it to dare mighty things, to win glorious triumphs, even though checkered by failure, than to take rank with those poor spirits who neither enjoy much nor suffer much, because they live in the gray twilight that knows not victory nor defeat."  Theodore Roosevelt

It's Over and It Is Just Beginning

Labor Day Monday - a day traditionally considered to be the end of summer. Tomorrow marks returns to school and to a more disciplined schedule of work with summer vacations completed.


Technically - summer is over on the autumnal equinox, which is scheduled for 3:09 a.m. UTC (Coordinated Universal Time) on September 23rd, 2010. On that day, the sun crosses the equator and moves southward in the northern hemisphere. At that time, the earth’s axis of rotation is perpendicular to the line connecting the centers of the earth and the sun.

Mmmhmmm...that's all the technical explanation required...And now - to the point...
It's Over
Summer 2010 was radically different from the summers of the recent past. It was challenging as I learned about handling rejection, trying to find a new job, change, and rebirth.


This summer brought relief of rejection in many forms:
- a few excessive ice cream consumptions (should have bought stock in Dairy Queen)
- some chocolate binges (dark for the antioxidants)
- lots of job research and reading
- full contact racquetball matches (getting hit stings!)
- obsessive cleaning jags
- a half marathon
- a three day 60 mile walk to serve a cause more important than myself


Those relief efforts have left me with a couple extra pounds - but they will be soon gone again when marathon training gets serious starting tomorrow.

There were tears, more than I'd like to admit. Eventually, the tears led to giggles, smiles, and finally back to the laughter that permeates my life. The most important thing was that no matter how dark the mood, I knew I could transform and become stronger and more confident than I had ever been.


I also can't recall a summer when I have seen more butterflies. Monarchs, yellow ones, white ones - they have been everywhere. The development of a butterfly follows several stages - and my summer 2010 seems to have been the chrysalis stage. That stage of a butterfly is marked by little movement. But it is the stage in which growth and differentiation occurs. It is a protected covering, a sheltered state, or a stage of being or growth.

Peaceful and quiet, not frantic and frenzied, summer 2010 has been a gift of contemplation, evaluation, and growth, and certainly a sheltered state of sorts. It was a transformational journey and a blessing. It will always be a time in my life I will value for the lessons learned about patience, forgiveness, acceptance, and letting go control of that which I cannot control.

It Is Just Beginning
September 7th, 2010 - New Season/New Beginning

The adult butterfly emerges from the chrysalis and expands its wings by pumping haemolymph (a fluid) into the wing veins. This sudden and rapid change is called metamorphosis.

More on that in the next post...